TAPPING THE 40 PERCENT

Making a 40% moment

What's the big idea?
"This finding suggests to me that even after we take into account our genetically determined personalities (i.e., who we are) and the rich and complex circumstances of our lives (i.e., what we face), 40 percent of the differences in our happiness levels are still left unexplained. What makes up this 40 percent? Besides our genes and the situations that we confront, there is one critical thing left: our behavior. Thus the key to happiness lies not in changing our genetic makeup (which is impossible) and not in changing our circumstances (i.e., seeking wealth or attractiveness or better colleagues, which is usually impractical), but in our daily intentional activities." (Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, "The How of Happiness," p. 22).

So what?
Perhaps after reading the above you are sensing a downer message. After all, this means that half (or a little more) of our happiness is determined by factors outside of our control. And although this is correct, it is not the most important meaning of the research. Despite the outside-our-control set points and circumstances, we each have a surprisingly large amount of influence over our own happiness. This means that all of us can be happier, even a great deal happier. This is fabulous news! Most of us have a large reservoir of untapped potential that, if properly tapped, could raise our levels of happiness in life--up to 40% more! This also means that for those of us that tend to be "happy-challenged" there is little excuse, since so much of our happiness is within our own control. So get out there and intentionally, habitually access those untapped areas of happiness in your life.

Now what?
So what can we do to tap into that 40%? Well, for me at least, I experience higher levels of happiness when I consistently practice two things: (1) commit to a few meaningful goals (e.g., completing an academic degree or planning a family vacation) that I can devotedly pursue; (2) participate in an engaging activity (e.g., playing drums or hiking in the mountains) in which I "lose" myself. If you discover that these work for you, then great. If not, try one of the following (Dr. Lyubomirsky has observed these patterns of thinking and behaving in the happiest people):

• spend a great amount of time with your family and friends;


• express gratitude for what you have;


• be the first to offer someone help;


• imagine the future with optimism;


• live in the present, savoring pleasures;


• make physical activity a habit;


• commit to a lifelong ambition;


• and even in life's inevitable distress and tragedy, allow yourself to fully feel and respond to it through the strength of your spirit.

--S.a.t.S.

 

TAPPING THE 40 PERCENT

Making a 40% moment

What's the big idea?
"This finding suggests to me that even after we take into account our genetically determined personalities (i.e., who we are) and the rich and complex circumstances of our lives (i.e., what we face), 40 percent of the differences in our happiness levels are still left unexplained. What makes up this 40 percent? Besides our genes and the situations that we confront, there is one critical thing left: our behavior. Thus the key to happiness lies not in changing our genetic makeup (which is impossible) and not in changing our circumstances (i.e., seeking wealth or attractiveness or better colleagues, which is usually impractical), but in our daily intentional activities." (Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, "The How of Happiness," p. 22).

So what?
Perhaps after reading the above you are sensing a downer message. After all, this means that half (or a little more) of our happiness is determined by factors outside of our control. And although this is correct, it is not the most important meaning of the research. Despite the outside-our-control set points and circumstances, we each have a surprisingly large amount of influence over our own happiness. This means that all of us can be happier, even a great deal happier. This is fabulous news! Most of us have a large reservoir of untapped potential that, if properly tapped, could raise our levels of happiness in life--up to 40% more! This also means that for those of us that tend to be "happy-challenged" there is little excuse, since so much of our happiness is within our own control. So get out there and intentionally, habitually access those untapped areas of happiness in your life.  

Now what?
So what can we do to tap into that 40%? Well, for me at least, I experience higher levels of happiness when I consistently practice two things: (1) commit to a few meaningful goals (e.g., completing an academic degree or planning a family vacation) that I can devotedly pursue; (2) participate in an engaging activity (e.g., playing drums or hiking in the mountains) in which I "lose" myself. If you discover that these work for you, then great. If not, try one of the following (Dr. Lyubomirsky has observed these patterns of thinking and behaving in the happiest people):

• spend a great amount of time with your family and friends; 
• express gratitude for what you have; 
• be the first to offer someone help; 
• imagine the future with optimism; 
• live in the present, savoring pleasures; 
• make physical activity a habit; 
• commit to a lifelong ambition; 
• and even in life's inevitable distress and tragedy, allow yourself to fully feel and respond to it through the strength of your spirit.     

--S.a.t.S.

LIMPING ALONG WITH GOD

Limping, attached to God

What's the big idea?
"Wrestling with the question of God is intensely personal. And none of us can escape it. You are who you are alone before God. Nothing more. Nothing less. What you do with the question of God shapes and colors everything in and around you...Whether you know it or not, you have a relationship style that impacts how you do--or don't do--intimacy with those you love, and in particular, with God. That's what the profound invitation of the Bible is all about: to be in a meaningful relationship with God." (Dr. Tim Clinton & Dr. Joshua Straub, "God Attachment," p. 18).

So what?
God and what to do with him cannot be escaped, regardless of our degree of spiritual inclination. Convictions about God are at our core. And as such, they impact every aspect of our lives, from the more routine (e.g., decisions about free time) to the deeply personal (e.g., beliefs about afterlife). How we view God and his interest in us greatly impacts our experience in human relationships. Likewise, how we connect with others greatly impacts our experience of God. The great news is that God knows all of this--the good, the bad, and the ugly--and befriends us right there on that basis, and then steps out with us in a lifelong walk of increasingly healthy, meaningful relating.

Now what?
Like many of you, I walk through life with an anxious limp, favoring a gait that at times leads me in circles of fear. Past experiences as well as patterns of relating to others have shaped me in this way. And due in great part to this, I also tend to walk with God favoring this anxiety-laden, fear-of-abandonment limp. So how about you? What's your style of relating to others, especially to God? Whatever it is, an important first step to growing through this challenge is to (1) write down a few life experiences that you think may have shaped how you relate to God, and (2) what (if any) difference he makes in your life now. This will provide you some needed insight, which you can then turn into movements toward your desired relationship with God (and these I'll address in future blogs).

--S.a.t.S.

LIMPING ALONG WITH GOD

Limping, attached to God

What's the big idea?
"Wrestling with the question of God is intensely personal. And none of us can escape it. You are who you are alone before God. Nothing more. Nothing less. What you do with the question of God shapes and colors everything in and around you...Whether you know it or not, you have a relationship style that impacts how you do--or don't do--intimacy with those you love, and in particular, with God. That's what the profound invitation of the Bible is all about: to be in a meaningful relationship with God." (Dr. Tim Clinton & Dr. Joshua Straub, "God Attachment," p. 18).

So what?
God and what to do with him cannot be escaped, regardless of our degree of spiritual inclination. Convictions about God are at our core. And as such, they impact every aspect of our lives, from the more routine (e.g., decisions about free time) to the deeply personal (e.g., beliefs about afterlife). How we view God and his interest in us greatly impacts our experience in human relationships. Likewise, how we connect with others greatly impacts our experience of God. The great news is that God knows all of this--the good, the bad, and the ugly--and befriends us right there on that basis, and then steps out with us in a lifelong walk of increasingly healthy, meaningful relating.

Now what?
Like many of you, I walk through life with an anxious limp, favoring a gait that at times leads me in circles of fear. Past experiences as well as patterns of relating to others have shaped me in this way. And due in great part to this, I also tend to walk with God favoring this anxiety-laden, fear-of-abandonment limp. So how about you? What's your style of relating to others, especially to God? Whatever it is, an important first step to growing through this challenge is to (1) write down a few life experiences that you think may have shaped how you relate to God, and (2) what (if any) difference he makes in your life now. This will provide you some needed insight, which you can then turn into movements toward your desired relationship with God (and these I'll address in future blogs).

--S.a.t.S.

WHAT A LONG STRANGE TRIP IT'LL BE

Starting a journey

 

As I launch my blog it might be helpful to provide you a brief description of its content and intent. Family Trippin' is primarily an "edutaining" (educative/entertaining) outlet for my own musings about family - usually related to ours (i.e., the human family in general), but sometimes just mine (i.e., my spouse and spawns), and occasionally yours (i.e., I might personally know you and specifically mention you in a post as a way either of getting revenge or giving honor... you decide).

My blog is also about what I call trippin' - metaphorical shorthand for the fun things we do together (as in "We had a great camping trip."), or the times we fail each other (as in "I'm so sorry; I know my broken promise really tripped you up."), or the way in which we are so uniquely freaky (as in "I can't believe you eat pizza with a fork...you must be trippin'!").

I'm really excited about this new adventure, and mostly because it's a dialogue with you. Here I simply catch and release the muse (and maybe poke it a little on occasion with characteristic dry, irreverent humor to get it moving) but you chase and return it. And through this playful conversation we can discover together new energy for this most important of human journeys: Family Trippin'. 

--S.a.t.S.

WHAT A LONG STRANGE TRIP IT'LL BE

Starting a journey

As I launch my blog it might be helpful to provide you a brief description of its content and intent. Family Trippin' is primarily an "edutaining" (educative/entertaining) outlet for my own musings about family - usually related to ours (i.e., the human family in general), but sometimes just mine (i.e., my spouse and spawns), and occasionally yours (i.e., I might personally know you and specifically mention you in a post as a way either of getting revenge or giving honor... you decide).

My blog is also about what I call trippin' - metaphorical shorthand for the fun things we do together (as in "We had a great camping trip."), or the times we fail each other (as in "I'm so sorry; I know my broken promise really tripped you up."), or the way in which we are so uniquely freaky (as in "I can't believe you eat pizza with a fork...you must be trippin'!").

I'm really excited about this new adventure, and mostly because it's a dialogue with you. Here I simply catch and release the muse (and maybe poke it a little on occasion with characteristic dry, irreverent humor to get it moving) but you chase and return it. And through this playful conversation we can discover together new energy for this most important of human journeys: Family Trippin'. 

--S.a.t.S.